Gossip Girl... One Tree Hill... American Idol... America's Next Top Model...

is it normal to always have the need to get some emotion by just watching
these tv shows? i can't seem to figure out why i always and as in always get the most
meaning about every little detail that turns out in these shows...
i don't know why... but it really gets me... it affects me...

do i really have to like become affected by everything that happens in these shows???
it's like every time i watch it, it seems to read me....

i hate it... i get dumbfounded.... crying alone....
realizing how it could have been easier if i did lead my life the way things turn out in
these shows.... it's pretty annoying sometimes.... i hate having to depend the way i think
and feel with the lessons i get to comprehend every time i do watch an episode of these shows...

but i gotta be honest... it makes me feel safe somehow...
and i get a little hope that maybe someday, things would just turn out ok...
we'll see...